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Committed By Elizabeth Gilbert | Book Summary

Quick Notes

Discover the profound insights on marriage in Elizabeth Gilbert’s ‘Committed.’ As a sequel to ‘Eat, Pray, Love,’ it delves into Gilbert’s unexpected journey from commitment aversion to a union forced by visa constraints. Through tales of Hmong culture, historical perspectives, and personal experiences, Gilbert questions modern expectations of marriage. She explores the delicate balance between autonomy and intimacy, emphasizing forgiveness and preemptive conflict resolution. ‘Committed’ challenges conventional notions of love and reveals marriage as a complex, evolving tapestry of shared stories. Gilbert’s candid narrative is a compelling exploration of the intricate dynamics that define a lasting union.

In Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Committed,” the author reflects on marriage and its complexities, drawing from her personal experiences. The narrative unfolds after the events of “Eat, Pray, Love,” where Gilbert meets Felipe, a Brazilian living in Bali. The couple, initially averse to marriage due to past divorces, faces the necessity of tying the knot because of visa issues. The exploration of marriage begins with Liz and Felipe’s backgrounds. Both had experienced divorce and the ensuing emotional turmoil. Despite pledging fidelity, they initially resisted marriage, choosing a three-month visa cycle that allowed them to stay committed without formalizing their union. However, when confronted with the possibility of permanent separation due to immigration restrictions, they decide to marry.

The book delves into cultural perspectives on marriage, contrasting Western expectations with the communal nature of the Hmong clan in Vietnam. It questions whether modern Western marriages, centered around a small nucleus, face greater challenges compared to more communal structures. The narrative suggests that the pursuit of personal happiness through marriage might be unrealistic, emphasizing that love and marriage are not always interlinked. Examining marriage historically, the book highlights its varied forms, from unions between one man and several women to ghost marriages in China. Gilbert contends that the modern concept of love-based marriage is relatively recent, emphasizing marriage as a social contract. She proposes that second marriages, being more aware of the inherent risks, reflect respect for forces larger than individual expectations.

The theme of infatuation emerges when Liz and Felipe’s visa process is delayed. Gilbert reflects on desire, drawing parallels with Buddha’s philosophy that suffering stems from longing. The book also references a mythical story by Aristophanes, suggesting that humans perpetually seek a perfect partner to regain lost completeness. Gilbert explores the delicate balance between autonomy and intimacy within marriage. The challenges faced by Liz and Felipe, such as conflicting travel preferences, lead to the realization that mechanisms for conflict resolution are essential to sustaining a relationship. The analogy of porcupines seeking warmth while avoiding quill-related injuries highlights the perpetual balancing act inherent in marriage.

The narrative touches on the concept of subversion within marriage, likening the exchange of stories and memories to the trade of goods in the city of Eufemia from Italo Calvino’s “Invisible Cities.” Gilbert contends that intimacy causes individuals to assimilate each other’s stories, creating a shared history. In the final chapters, Liz and Felipe decide to get married, acknowledging the challenges and uncertainties of this commitment. The book concludes with the notion that marriage is a significant, complex step, requiring a delicate balance between autonomy, intimacy, and the acceptance of inherent uncertainties.

FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions)

Is Committed a sequel?

Elizabeth Gilbert’s book “Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage,” can be considered a thematic sequel to her earlier memoir, “Eat, Pray, Love.” In “Committed,” Gilbert delves into the institution of marriage, exploring its history, cultural variations, and reservations about it. While not a direct continuation of the events in “Eat, Pray, Love,” “Committed” follows Gilbert’s journey and reflections on relationships, making it a related and thematic exploration of her life after the events in the first book.

Is Committed based on true events?

Yes, “Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage” by Elizabeth Gilbert is based on true events. In the book, Gilbert explores the concept of marriage, delving into its history, cultural significance, and her own experiences. The narrative unfolds as a blend of research, personal reflection, and anecdotes, chronicling Gilbert’s journey to understand and come to terms with the institution of marriage. The book is a sequel of sorts to her earlier memoir, “Eat, Pray, Love,” and it follows her life after the events of the first book. Gilbert’s writing in “Committed” is deeply rooted in her observations and experiences, making it a non-fictional exploration of marriage and relationships.

What does Gilbert say in committed?

In “Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage,” Elizabeth Gilbert shares her reflections and insights into the institution of marriage. Gilbert explores the history and cultural variations of marriage, drawing from extensive research and her own experiences. She candidly discusses her initial reluctance and skepticism about marriage, especially after a challenging divorce. Throughout the book, Gilbert raises thought-provoking questions about the societal expectations and personal sacrifices associated with marriage. She examines the evolving nature of relationships and the impact of cultural, religious, and historical influences on the concept of matrimony. Ultimately, “Committed” serves as both a memoir and a sociocultural exploration, offering readers a nuanced perspective on the complexities and nuances of marriage.

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